Student: Mrs. Caramagno! Mrs. Caramagno! I am very irritated with this pen.
(Student trying to color code her classwork holds up a generic marker with a black body and a red cap.)
Student: Look, this pen says its red, but... (with a flourish, student removes cap)... its really green! I thought I was getting red and I got green!
Me: Honey, that's our trans pen. Sometimes, the inside doesn't match the outside, but this classroom welcomes all pens, so this one belongs just as much as the others.
(Amused chuckling from table...)
As teachers, I feel like sometimes every moment is a test to see if I am going to walk the walk as well as talk the talk. Its all well and good to SAY you support all students, even the challenging ones, or you welcome all varieties of young person, even the ones you don't really understand because, let's be honest, you are now officially old... But that isn't enough. Students figure out really early when you are only giving lip service to an ideal without backing it up with actions.
I have to constantly remind myself... what do I really care about here? Yes, I want student work to be turned in on time... but do I want that more than I want the student to do the work and learn the stuff. Of course, I don't want racist or sexist or homophobic comments in my classroom... but do I believe in that so strongly I am willing to stop my lesson and challenge every single one?
The longer I am a teacher, the more masterful I am at teaching, the more likely I am to stick to my guns. Today, I'll drop content, I'll forgo timeliness, I make accommodation after accommodation, I'll ignore due dates and give 2nd, 3rd and 4th chances, sometimes long after it makes sense, because the idea of sending my students out into the world without the skills and knowledge to survive and thrive horrifies me.
And sometimes the lessons I am teaching my students explicitly and otherwise aren't so much about content or skills as they are about making sure I have a classroom where students can try new things, take risks, and be vulnerable. That means, I have to pay attention to what gets my love and what I ignore, what and who I respond to fiercely, and what I let slide. Each encounter paints a picture about what I Really care about and not just what I say I care about.
That's why this snippet of passing conversation in my room is so important. It shows my students I mean what I say. I mean it when I say all students are welcome, I mean it when I say they can do better, or I'm proud of them, or I will be there when they need me. If I want them to trust me, I have to do what I say I am going to do. I'll have another post soon, I'm sure, for what to do when I inevitably don't say the right thing at the right time. But for now, I'm just going to keep telling all my students they are welcome, they are loved, and we need all of them, no mater what color they turn out to be.
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